Comments on: Pressure to have kids http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/ Random musings from the radical feminist Christian antiracist left - some having to do with Ubuntu Fri, 10 Feb 2012 01:52:14 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Danny http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-28968 Danny Sat, 17 Dec 2011 08:37:35 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-28968 It is overpopulation that is to blame for the problems we have in the world today. Overpopulation is the root cause. 7-8 billion human beings are way too many for our planet to support sufficiently. Food shortage, water shortage, global warming, war, etc. All these things have their filthy roots anchored in overpopulation. Just like a plague of rats, we will excessively increase until everything is destroyed, including ourselves. We are on a path that will only lead to destruction, unless we open our minds to reason and comprehend the true cause. It is overpopulation that is to blame for the problems we have in the world today. Overpopulation is the root cause. 7-8 billion human beings are way too many for our planet to support sufficiently. Food shortage, water shortage, global warming, war, etc. All these things have their filthy roots anchored in overpopulation. Just like a plague of rats, we will excessively increase until everything is destroyed, including ourselves. We are on a path that will only lead to destruction, unless we open our minds to reason and comprehend the true cause.

]]> By: Shit http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-10410 Shit Fri, 20 Aug 2010 16:51:20 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-10410 Good post. But I don't agree with the previous comment which states that since you're child-free you should use that extra time and money you would otherwise have spent on kids to help humanity. It all depends on your beliefs or lack thereof. As an atheist, a childfree, a very questioning and a rebellious person I do not think it is necessary to do anything for the community or help out humanity to make this a better world. People like me are being frowned upon but then if you think that life has no meaning other than what you give it you can do anything you want to do and not what is considered to be the 'right thing to do'. With that being said your options are limitless and you can combine them in different ways; you can choose to help your community regularly, rarely, or not at all. You can choose to help only certain people like your friends, parents or your spouse (again: rarely, sometimes, never) or even choose to only live for yourself (fully, partially, not at all.) These options are all OK. Ultimately the choices you make will not matter after you die. Unless you become famous (and most of us will not because we're average and not outstanding in any way.) On another note, there is so much pressure to have kids it's unbelievable! But most of it stems from ignorance and emotions. The more you think logically and question society's standards, the less likely you are to conform and to have kids. Usually most (not all) women are too emotional and think 'oh, so cute!' when they see a baby. They are designed that way to reproduce. But people should override their emotions and just reason with logic whether having kids is really for them instead of just following their basic mating instincts. On the other hand, as long as we'll have some ignorant and overly emotional people we will have babies and our species will survive. Therefore if you decide you want to be child-free leave the burden of having kids to those people who likely have nothing else better to do with their lives and enjoy your own life the way you want to with no regrets. Good post. But I don’t agree with the previous comment which states that since you’re child-free you should use that extra time and money you would otherwise have spent on kids to help humanity. It all depends on your beliefs or lack thereof. As an atheist, a childfree, a very questioning and a rebellious person I do not think it is necessary to do anything for the community or help out humanity to make this a better world. People like me are being frowned upon but then if you think that life has no meaning other than what you give it you can do anything you want to do and not what is considered to be the ‘right thing to do’. With that being said your options are limitless and you can combine them in different ways; you can choose to help your community regularly, rarely, or not at all. You can choose to help only certain people like your friends, parents or your spouse (again: rarely, sometimes, never) or even choose to only live for yourself (fully, partially, not at all.) These options are all OK. Ultimately the choices you make will not matter after you die. Unless you become famous (and most of us will not because we’re average and not outstanding in any way.)
On another note, there is so much pressure to have kids it’s unbelievable! But most of it stems from ignorance and emotions. The more you think logically and question society’s standards, the less likely you are to conform and to have kids. Usually most (not all) women are too emotional and think ‘oh, so cute!’ when they see a baby. They are designed that way to reproduce. But people should override their emotions and just reason with logic whether having kids is really for them instead of just following their basic mating instincts. On the other hand, as long as we’ll have some ignorant and overly emotional people we will have babies and our species will survive. Therefore if you decide you want to be child-free leave the burden of having kids to those people who likely have nothing else better to do with their lives and enjoy your own life the way you want to with no regrets.

]]> By: ubuntucat http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-303 ubuntucat Fri, 24 Aug 2007 01:07:50 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-303 Thanks for your $.02, kwilliam. Thanks for your $.02, kwilliam.

]]> By: kwilliam http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-302 kwilliam Thu, 23 Aug 2007 21:25:26 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-302 As a kid myself, I thought my opinion might add another perspective. On the whole, I think having kids is a Good Thing (TM), because if nobody had kids, we'd all die. ;-) However, having too many kids causes overpopulation, which taxes our planet's resources. Obviously, a balance is needed, and on one hand, I'm greatful that you are willing to forgoe having children in order to preserve that balance. On the other hand, I think it is important to help others and leave the world a better place than you found it. Having children is one way to do that, because you have so much influence on your children - more influence than you will have on anyone else. If you've ever thought, "Gee, I wish there were more good people in the world," it is a way you can actually make that happen. It is hard, and a lot of parents do not dedicate enough time to their kids, and let other influences (TV, friends, etc) shape their character. It can also be extremely rewarding; my father will surely attest that I've made him prouder than anything else in his life has. However, you say you've worked in education and admissions. You spent countless hours on the Ubuntu forums. (I know, because I continually encounter your helpful posts.) Therefore, I think it is safe to say that you are making a positive difference in people's lives, which IMHO, is what life is about. My only advice is to use some of that extra time and money you'll have by not having kids to continue making a positive difference in people's lives. (I don't know how much that advice is worth, but since I've written all this, I might as well post it. :-) As a kid myself, I thought my opinion might add another perspective. On the whole, I think having kids is a Good Thing (TM), because if nobody had kids, we’d all die. ;-) However, having too many kids causes overpopulation, which taxes our planet’s resources. Obviously, a balance is needed, and on one hand, I’m greatful that you are willing to forgoe having children in order to preserve that balance.

On the other hand, I think it is important to help others and leave the world a better place than you found it. Having children is one way to do that, because you have so much influence on your children – more influence than you will have on anyone else. If you’ve ever thought, “Gee, I wish there were more good people in the world,” it is a way you can actually make that happen. It is hard, and a lot of parents do not dedicate enough time to their kids, and let other influences (TV, friends, etc) shape their character. It can also be extremely rewarding; my father will surely attest that I’ve made him prouder than anything else in his life has.

However, you say you’ve worked in education and admissions. You spent countless hours on the Ubuntu forums. (I know, because I continually encounter your helpful posts.) Therefore, I think it is safe to say that you are making a positive difference in people’s lives, which IMHO, is what life is about. My only advice is to use some of that extra time and money you’ll have by not having kids to continue making a positive difference in people’s lives.

(I don’t know how much that advice is worth, but since I’ve written all this, I might as well post it. :-)

]]> By: Count Shrimpula http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-300 Count Shrimpula Wed, 18 Jul 2007 15:21:41 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-300 See here's what I don't get, and Arstan illustrated it nicely there. Why is it selfish to not want kids? Aren't the more selfish people the ones says, "Well I had kids because I want someone to take care of me when I'm old"? I don't get why having kids is the default, and you have to justify <i>not</i> wanting to have them. It should be the other way around. Having kids is a big, super-life-changing deal. It is not something you should do just because you're "supposed to", and it should never be taken lightly. It is not something you should do because other people want you to do it. It will change your life, you will have to radically alter your priorities, it is expensive (not that that's a reason not to have kids, but it is something to take into account. If you can barely afford to feed yourself, it's not really fair to bring along a kid who will then be depending on you for food, shelter, and clothing for the next 18 years or so), and it is something you should really think deeply about, make sure you're ready, and then have a kid because you're actually trying to, not because you were just being unsafe and kind of "oops" had a kid. Believe me, the child will be much happier and have a much better life if you actually wanted him and had him on purpose. See here’s what I don’t get, and Arstan illustrated it nicely there. Why is it selfish to not want kids? Aren’t the more selfish people the ones says, “Well I had kids because I want someone to take care of me when I’m old”?

I don’t get why having kids is the default, and you have to justify not wanting to have them. It should be the other way around. Having kids is a big, super-life-changing deal. It is not something you should do just because you’re “supposed to”, and it should never be taken lightly. It is not something you should do because other people want you to do it. It will change your life, you will have to radically alter your priorities, it is expensive (not that that’s a reason not to have kids, but it is something to take into account. If you can barely afford to feed yourself, it’s not really fair to bring along a kid who will then be depending on you for food, shelter, and clothing for the next 18 years or so), and it is something you should really think deeply about, make sure you’re ready, and then have a kid because you’re actually trying to, not because you were just being unsafe and kind of “oops” had a kid. Believe me, the child will be much happier and have a much better life if you actually wanted him and had him on purpose.

]]> By: ubuntucat http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-299 ubuntucat Wed, 18 Jul 2007 13:39:59 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-299 The comments are, in fact, open, Arstan. Thank you for sharing your opinion (even though I don't agree with it). The comments are, in fact, open, Arstan. Thank you for sharing your opinion (even though I don’t agree with it).

]]> By: Arstan http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-298 Arstan Wed, 18 Jul 2007 05:15:24 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-298 UbuntuCat, 1. This is very personal. 2. If you posted such personal thing, get ready for various comments. Even people who will judge you. This way or the other. 3. If you are sick of people pressuring, why would you post this? I don't understand. A lot of people have children, most of them will disagree. May be they just don't leave comments here. 4. And I think you are just being selfish, ignorant and afraid of taking responsibility. Since the comments are open, I decided to leave my point of view. Arstan UbuntuCat,
1. This is very personal.
2. If you posted such personal thing, get ready for various comments. Even people who will judge you. This way or the other.
3. If you are sick of people pressuring, why would you post this? I don’t understand. A lot of people have children, most of them will disagree. May be they just don’t leave comments here.
4. And I think you are just being selfish, ignorant and afraid of taking responsibility.

Since the comments are open, I decided to leave my point of view.

Arstan

]]> By: Frak http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-297 Frak Tue, 17 Jul 2007 03:17:10 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-297 Hey man, It's your choice. Those people around you who have kids that say "You should have kids", they're doing it out of spite. Take from my brother whose a psychiatrist, M.D. William Vandever, Marriage and Religion (I didn't say God) are matters that can make people very happy. Turns out unless your living under a roadway, Money won't make you very happy, only make you stressed. But kids, they are one of the most stressful events a couple can have. Couples say children are one of the happiest events that can happen to them, but what they forget is that their children 97% of the time are a pain in the a**, and the barbaric mind only recalls happy times for preservation of the bloodline. But yeah, its your choice man, you choose your future, nobody else. Hey man, It’s your choice. Those people around you who have kids that say “You should have kids”, they’re doing it out of spite. Take from my brother whose a psychiatrist, M.D. William Vandever, Marriage and Religion (I didn’t say God) are matters that can make people very happy. Turns out unless your living under a roadway, Money won’t make you very happy, only make you stressed. But kids, they are one of the most stressful events a couple can have. Couples say children are one of the happiest events that can happen to them, but what they forget is that their children 97% of the time are a pain in the a**, and the barbaric mind only recalls happy times for preservation of the bloodline.
But yeah, its your choice man, you choose your future, nobody else.

]]> By: rampancy http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-296 rampancy Tue, 17 Jul 2007 03:08:42 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-296 http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/07/16/wsaudi116.xml http://digg.com/world_news/Honor_Killing_in_Britain So, riddle me this, Prakash J K: if we Westerners are so evil and materialistic, what do you say about that? Oh, and just to make sure you remember that we Catholics aren't blameless too... http://abclocal.go.com/kabc/story?section=local&id=547908 As a Catholic Christian, I'm ashamed of people like Pradesh J K and others like him who cast shame on my religious beliefs with their hateful and bigoted slander. If there's anyone who shouldn't have the honor and privlidge to reproduce, it's him. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/07/16/wsaudi116.xml

http://digg.com/world_news/Honor_Killing_in_Britain

So, riddle me this, Prakash J K: if we Westerners are so evil and materialistic, what do you say about that?

Oh, and just to make sure you remember that we Catholics aren’t blameless too…

http://abclocal.go.com/kabc/story?section=local&id=547908

As a Catholic Christian, I’m ashamed of people like Pradesh J K and others like him who cast shame on my religious beliefs with their hateful and bigoted slander. If there’s anyone who shouldn’t have the honor and privlidge to reproduce, it’s him.

]]> By: Claire http://www.psychocats.net/ubuntucat/pressure-to-have-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-301 Claire Mon, 16 Jul 2007 19:45:07 +0000 http://ubuntucat.wordpress.com/2007/07/08/pressure-to-have-kids/#comment-301 God, at last someone who has responded to the question of actually thinking about CHOICE when it comes to procreation. As a single woman of a 'certain age' I acknowledge all too clearly the pressure you are under. A colleague even said in front of me to another colleague the other day " And Claire still got time to have one or two". The lack of sensitivity frequentely demonstrated to me from those with kids to those of us without is sometimes overwhelming. I am always sensitive and accomodating around those with children, not criticising their decisions or choices. Its about time society changed to consider the feelings and choices of the childfree and childless! God, at last someone who has responded to the question of actually thinking about CHOICE when it comes to procreation. As a single woman of a ‘certain age’ I acknowledge all too clearly the pressure you are under.
A colleague even said in front of me to another colleague the other day ” And Claire still got time to have one or two”. The lack of sensitivity frequentely demonstrated to me from those with kids to those of us without is sometimes overwhelming. I am always sensitive and accomodating around those with children, not criticising their decisions or choices.
Its about time society changed to consider the feelings and choices of the childfree and childless!

]]>